Purposeful Visions' A Generation We Cannot Afford to Lose banner depicting youth violence, grief, mental health struggles, and hope through education, mentorship, and community support.

“Our children are not disposable. Their futures are not negotiable.” A generation is being lost to violence, suicide, incarceration, and emotional struggles. It's time for families, schools, and communities to come together to protect our children's future. — Purposeful Visions

A Generation We Cannot Afford to Lose: When Will We Stop Burying Our Children?

By Delynn Turner, M.S., GDC-CSp, CLC
Purposeful Visions | October 2026
Estimated reading time: 8–10 minutes

Our children are dying. Our children are killing. Our children are going to prison. And somewhere between the warning signs, unanswered cries for help, and another heartbreaking headline, we are losing a generation we cannot afford to lose.

How Many More Children Must We Bury?

Another candlelight vigil.

Another balloon release.

Another grieving mother standing beside a photograph of a child who should still be alive.

Another school community trying to explain why a student will never return.

Another young person facing criminal charges that could change the course of their life forever.

When does it stop?

We are watching a heartbreaking crisis unfold across America, and it is happening in our own communities.

Our children are being lost to gun violence, suicide, substance abuse, crime, incarceration, and untreated emotional pain.

Some are dying before they have an opportunity to experience adulthood. Others are entering the criminal justice system before they have even finished high school.

And some are suffering silently, struggling with emotions they do not know how to express.

We are losing our children from every direction.

The question is no longer whether there is a problem.

The question is: What are we prepared to do about it?

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Key Takeaways: A Generation We Cannot Afford to Lose

We are losing children in multiple ways. Youth violence, suicide, substance abuse, incarceration, and untreated emotional trauma are robbing young people of their futures.
One tragedy affects generations. When a young person dies or becomes incarcerated, the consequences extend beyond that individual, affecting parents, children, siblings, schools, and entire communities.
Parents cannot protect children from every decision they make. Teaching accountability, emotional regulation, conflict resolution, and responsible decision-making is just as important as protecting children from outside dangers.
Warning signs should never be ignored. Changes in behavior, isolation, hopelessness, aggression, and emotional distress may indicate that a young person needs additional support.
Prevention must come before tragedy. Families, schools, churches, community leaders, and policymakers must work together to provide mentorship, mental health resources, safe environments, and positive opportunities.
Our children need both compassion and accountability. Discipline, guidance, emotional support, and appropriate consequences help young people develop the skills necessary to navigate life's challenges.
Every child deserves a future worth fighting for. The message behind A Generation We Cannot Afford to Lose is clear: We must stop waiting until our children become headlines before deciding their lives matter.

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Three Tragedies That Should Make Every Community Stop and Think

Norfolk, Virginia: A 16-Year-Old Father Whose Future Was Cut Short

On October 7, 2026, 16-year-old Kevon Drumgold, a student at Norview High School in Norfolk, Virginia, was shot and killed following dismissal.

But Kevon was more than a student.

He was a son.

A football player.

A young man with dreams.

And he was the father of two little girls.

According to WAVY News 10's reporting, Kevon's mother confirmed that he had two daughters.

Think about that for a moment.

Two little girls will grow up without their father.

A mother must live with the unimaginable pain of burying her son.

A school community has lost one of its students.

Other teenagers were injured, and a 17-year-old was charged in connection with the shooting.

One young man is dead. Other young lives have been forever changed. Families on every side are suffering.

We are losing our children to the graveyard and the criminal justice system at the same time.

How many more young people will never receive their diplomas?

How many more children will grow up without a parent?

How many more families will have to bury a child while another family watches their child face the possibility of incarceration?

This is not simply a crime statistic.

This is generational loss.

Old Dominion University: A Campus Community in Mourning

On October 21, 2026, Old Dominion University in Norfolk experienced a heartbreaking death on campus.

In an official message to the university community, university leadership acknowledged the loss and encouraged students, faculty, and staff to seek emotional support.

The circumstances surrounding the death had not been publicly established in the university's statement.

Regardless of the circumstances, a life was lost, loved ones were left grieving, and an entire campus was reminded of the importance of compassion and community support.

College is supposed to represent opportunity, independence, personal growth, and the beginning of a promising future.

Yet young adults may also experience overwhelming pressure, isolation, uncertainty, emotional struggles, and difficult life transitions.

We must create environments where asking for help is not viewed as weakness.

A young person should never feel that they must face life's most difficult moments alone.

Oregon: When an Elementary School Becomes the Scene of Tragedy

On October 15, 2026, a devastating shooting occurred at Silver Rail Elementary School in Bend, Oregon.

Three children, ages 5, 8, and 11, and a teacher were killed. Others were injured. The suspected shooter, a 16-year-old, also died.

According to ABC News, the victims were inside a special education classroom.

Imagine sending your five-year-old child to school, expecting to hear about their day when they return home.

Instead, you receive news no parent should ever have to hear.

An elementary school should be a place of learning, laughter, discovery, and safety.

Not a place where children must fear for their lives.

We must also recognize that disability and mental health conditions do not make individuals inherently violent. Understanding what contributed to this attack requires a careful investigation, not assumptions or stigma.

But the tragedy demands urgent questions about school safety, firearm access, warning signs, and intervention.

How do we protect our children when even their classrooms are no longer guaranteed to be safe?

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We Are Not Just Losing Children to Death

We are losing them to incarceration.

We are losing them to gangs.

We are losing them to addiction.

We are losing them to hopelessness, untreated trauma, and emotional isolation.

We are losing children who are physically present but emotionally disconnected.

Children who have stopped believing their lives matter.

Children who have learned to respond to disrespect with violence.

Children who believe carrying a weapon gives them power.

Children who cannot imagine a future beyond their present circumstances.

And children who are silently asking for help through changes in behavior that adults sometimes overlook.

Whether a young person ends up in a cemetery, a prison cell, or trapped in emotional darkness, we have lost something precious.

But the children who are still with us are not lost causes.

They need us to recognize their struggles before those struggles become tragedies.

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The Hardest Part of Parenting: Protecting Children From Themselves

Parenting has never been an easy responsibility.

We already have to protect our children from predators, drugs, gangs, exploitation, violence, and dangerous influences.

We teach them about stranger danger.

We warn them about drugs.

We try to protect them from harmful relationships, negative peer pressure, and unsafe situations.

We lose sleep worrying about what the world might do to our children.

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But what happens when the greatest danger becomes the decisions our children make themselves?

How do you protect a teenager who refuses to listen?

How do you protect a child who believes they are invincible?

How do you protect them from anger, impulsiveness, peer pressure, or the need to prove themselves?

How do you prevent one moment of poor judgment from destroying decades of opportunity?

You can teach your child to avoid gangs, but you cannot follow them everywhere.

You can warn them about drugs, but you cannot make every decision for them.

You can teach them to walk away from conflict, but you cannot control how they respond when someone challenges their pride.

And perhaps the most frightening reality of parenting is this:

You can do everything within your power to raise your child with love, guidance, and structure and still be unable to protect them from a decision they make when you are not there.

That is why emotional regulation, accountability, communication, discipline, and conflict-resolution skills are essential.

Not because we want to control our children forever.

But because one day we will not be standing beside them.

We must prepare them to make responsible decisions even when no adult is watching.

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Where Are We Going Wrong as a Society?

This is not about placing all the blame on parents.

It is not about blaming teachers.

And it is not about declaring an entire generation hopeless.

It is about recognizing that raising children requires an entire community.

We must begin asking difficult questions.

Are we teaching children how to handle anger, disappointment, and rejection?
Are we listening when our children tell us they are struggling?
Are we recognizing changes in behavior before they become crises?
Are we teaching conflict resolution before conflict turns violent?
Are we setting boundaries and holding children accountable?
Are we giving parents the resources and support they need?
Are schools equipped with adequate counselors and behavioral support?
Are communities providing positive role models, mentorship, and safe spaces?

We cannot expect children to demonstrate emotional maturity if we never teach them how to manage their emotions.

We cannot demand respect while failing to demonstrate it.

And we cannot wait until a tragedy occurs before deciding that prevention matters.

For more discussion about the emotional struggles facing today's youth, read our related Purposeful Visions article, What Is Happening to Our Children?.

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Accountability and Compassion Must Work Together

When a young person commits a violent crime, victims deserve justice.

Families deserve answers.

Communities deserve safety.

And those responsible must be held accountable through a fair legal process.

But accountability and prevention are not opposites.

We must also ask what happened before the violence.

Were there warning signs?

Was the child struggling emotionally?

Was there unresolved trauma?

Were there opportunities for intervention?

Did the young person have access to appropriate counseling, guidance, and support?

Not every violent act can be predicted or prevented.

But we can strengthen the systems that help young people before their circumstances escalate.

We cannot change yesterday's tragedy, but we have a responsibility to protect the children who are still here today.

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Parents, Schools, Churches, and Communities: We Need You

Parents must remain involved, even when children push them away.

Schools need effective counseling programs, conflict-resolution education, and access to trained mental health professionals.

Churches and community organizations can provide mentorship, safe spaces, family support, and positive relationships.

Local leaders must invest in prevention rather than responding only after another tragedy.

And policymakers must understand that protecting children requires more than condolences, speeches, and promises.

It requires resources, commitment, and meaningful action.

The CDC's youth violence prevention resources emphasize the importance of prevention and addressing the conditions that place young people at risk.

We must stop treating youth violence as something that only affects other people's children.

Every child belongs to someone's family. Every tragedy affects a community. And every life lost leaves a future that will never be realized.

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A Generation We Cannot Afford to Lose

The title of my book, The Generation We Cannot Afford to Lose, is more than a collection of words.

It is a warning.

It is a plea.

And it is a call to action.

I did not write this book because I believe our children are hopeless.

I wrote it because I believe they are worth fighting for.

We cannot afford to lose another generation to violence, emotional neglect, incarceration, addiction, and despair.

We cannot afford to ignore the pain that is being passed from one generation to another.

We cannot afford to normalize children burying children.

And we cannot continue expecting our young people to navigate a complicated world without guidance, structure, emotional support, and positive examples.

Every child deserves an opportunity to grow, learn, heal, and become more than their worst mistake or most painful experience.

We must stop waiting until our children become headlines before we decide their lives matter.

To learn more about the book and watch my discussion of Chapter One, visit the Purposeful Visions Healing Resources page.

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The Time to Act Is Now

Check on your children.

Ask the difficult questions.

Pay attention to their friendships, emotional well-being, online activities, and changes in behavior.

Teach them that asking for help is strength, not weakness.

Teach them that walking away from conflict is not cowardice.

Teach them that rejection is not the end of their future.

Teach them that anger does not justify violence.

Teach them that their actions have consequences.

And most importantly, remind them that their lives have value.

Their voices matter.

Their futures are worth protecting.

Because the greatest tragedy is not simply the number of children we have already lost.

It is the number we may continue to lose if we refuse to change.

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Frequently Asked Questions

1. Why are so many young people affected by violence, crime, and incarceration?

There is no single explanation. Exposure to violence, trauma, peer pressure, access to firearms, economic hardship, inadequate support systems, and other factors may contribute. Effective prevention requires families, schools, communities, and public institutions working together.

2. What warning signs should parents watch for?

Parents should pay attention to significant behavioral changes, social withdrawal, persistent hopelessness, threats of violence, substance use, or concerning changes in emotional well-being. These signs do not automatically mean a child will become violent, but they may indicate a need for additional support.

3. How can parents teach children to handle anger and conflict?

Parents can model healthy communication, establish consistent boundaries, teach emotional regulation, and encourage peaceful problem-solving. When difficulties persist, a qualified counselor or mental health professional may provide additional support.

4. What can schools do to help prevent youth violence?

Schools can strengthen counseling services, address bullying, teach conflict-resolution skills, create safe reporting systems, and build positive relationships between students and trusted adults.

5. Can counseling help families dealing with grief, trauma, or behavioral challenges?

Yes. Appropriate counseling can help individuals process grief, understand emotions, improve communication, and develop healthier coping strategies. The type of support needed depends on the individual and their circumstances.

6. What should I do if a child or young adult is experiencing a mental health crisis?

Listen without judgment, take their concerns seriously, and seek appropriate professional support.

In the United States, the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline is available by calling or texting 988. If someone is in immediate danger, call 911.

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A Message From Purposeful Visions

At Purposeful Visions, we believe healing begins with awareness, honest conversations, education, and meaningful support.

Our mission is to help individuals and families break generational cycles of grief, trauma, and silence while building healthier pathways toward hope and healing.

Through counseling, educational resources, community conversations, and books such as The Generation We Cannot Afford to Lose, we encourage families to confront difficult realities and work toward lasting change.

If you or someone you love is struggling with grief, trauma, or emotional challenges, support is available.

Learn more about Purposeful Visions and request support.

Explore Delynn Turner's book A Generation We Cannot Afford to Lose available on Amazon

Our children are not disposable. Their futures are not negotiable. And this is a generation we simply cannot afford to lose.

Disclaimer: This article is intended for educational and informational purposes and does not replace professional mental health care, medical advice, or emergency services.

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